Inquiry:
"I have a gazebo in my backyard constructed of stone (base) and wood
(pillars and roof). I am interested in converting it to rod-iron
or something much more attractive than the current ... from your website, I gather that you know your field. I wanted some
educated advice. Thank you for your time."
Shivan
My reply: Although it's spelled "wrought
iron" it should really be spelled "rot iron" because
this material invariably rusts at the welds and becomes a real expense in
the long-run to properly maintain. But a rod iron is used to give someone the shaft.
And applied with "the current", that should really give 'em a
real jolt!
Now here's rod iron→
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Inquiry: "We are moving into a bi-level that currently does not have a deck. I
would love to add a deck on the second story but there is a sunroom off
the lower level of the house. The only place to put the door to the deck
is the side of the house (there is a dining room window we could make a
door) and I would like to to wrap the deck around to the back of the
house overlooking the in-ground pool. I thought about the possibility of
making a simple walkway from the door and over the sunroom (maybe 3 or 4
feet wide, the sunroom has a slightly sloped roof) to where the deck
could open up off the back of the house. Do you have any pictures of
projects you may have done with similar obstacles? Or any advice on a
workable design? Thanks for your time." Denise
My reply: Oh really now. Anyway, just where are your pictures?
Comment: Contrary to some people's notions,
Mr.
Deck is not a free public information service.
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 Inquiry:
"Mr. Deck, this is only
my second deck and arbor I have built. Would you be kind enough to comment
on what you think of it? pictures attached." Steve
My reply: Not
bad for an amateur but ....... Delicate interior
molding applied to exterior structure. Latex caulking will wash out in
next downpour. 2x3s over an 8-foot span in the canopy won't last
3 months before sagging. Looks wimpy. Better leave town before the next
big storm.
Click on photo for
a full-screen view.
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Inquiry: If you can spare just a minute, I would like to share my scenario and
possibly get your opinion.
First, I understand that you hate triangular arbors. And I understand
why, too. But what I have in mind is really a freestanding trellis for
the bougainvillea to spread out over and cover and the area underneath.
The structure is not intended as a space for BBQs, lounge chairs, hot
tubs, or any human habitation. I'm looking for a trellis with some
design style.
Here's the setting. This is an upscale townhouse in Thousand Oaks
adjacent to the Santa Monica Mountains. The backyard is enclosed, and
about 20' x 25', accessed only by the back door of the residence. The
design theme of the building, by an award-winning architect is Span/Med/Cali,
with sand colored stucco and a tile roof. The interior features bull
nose finish and arch themes. There is also a column in the back yard
which supports the master suite balcony above. The column is clearly
design-theme oriented in the structure.
Having read through your site, my current thinking is this:
| 1. The posts should repeat the design theme of the building column,
but scaled back in thickness to, say 4-6" max.
2. Horizontal beams (3) would tie the posts together.
3. Slates would radiate from the corner post.
4. I am interested in considering all materials options to wood, but
am in over my head on this topic.
5. I expect the plant to
cover/hide most of the structure, but angle bracing and the exposed tips
of the radiating slates are design theme opportunities.
6. This job is too small for
you.
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↑ Something like this.
↑
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7. I couldn't afford your work no
matter how small the job.
8. I am willing to pay your for your
opinion and some guidance.
I look forward to hearing from you. Thanks in advance. Nate
My reply: Whew! Enough already.
Your offer to pay for my advice in #8,
however, is commendable. So here's my advice:
Your homeowners association there in Thousand
Oaks will not allow you to place a permanent structure as
you have described above 5 feet in height. However, trellises are not
considered permanent structures. So use two of our 8-foot high
solid-plastic trellises at right-angles to each other in the corner as
shown here (click on picture).
This advice will cost you the $200 minimum, which
you may redeem on the purchase of two
trellises.
Thanks in advance for your prompt payment.
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Inquiry:
Wow! I enjoyed your web site! I laughed at the critique
section! I marveled at the design section ....and I loved your text!
Tomorrow I will attempt to persuade my own board of directors to
petition another architectural committee within Gold River, Sacramento
County, CA. to move away from the sanctioned stale arbor designs and
onto new heights of beauty and function and I 'm using your web site to
help me. If you have a rep here let me know. Kathleen
My reply: Whoa there. Do you think my
designer arbors are things just anybody with a saw and hammer could build if
just shown a picture? Do you think your local contractors, once shown
what's possible, will just get inspired and start producing designer
arbors of their own, free of copyright infringement?
My rep for the Sacramento area
is the U.S. Register of Architectural Copyrights. Please pass that info
on to your architectural committees and board of directors.
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Message: Thanks for being out there!
And thanks for showing me that I CAN build my own deck, AND to show me what I need to do to make
it right. I promise to send pictures when I am done, and to honestly accept any criticisms that you care to
give.
Thanks, Alex 
My reply: Thanks for your nice comment -- but that doesn't get you any
encouragement from Mr. Deck.
If you got the impression that I was telling you how to do it yourself from my website, you are more naive than
a steer in a cattle car.
As a self-proclaimed do-it-yourselfer who thinks he's a match for the experienced professional, you have become afflicted with a malady known as delusion, curable, if not from an acquired infirmity while doing it yourself, then by
brain surgery at your local do-it-yourself lobotomy clinic.
All the world knows for a certainty that you get what you pay for; and you will be paying yourself nothing
Good luck; that's all an amateur has going.
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Message:
Mr. Deck:
I am not quite sure how to start this email,
according to your website you really do not have any "reason" to help
fellow builders, but I will give it a shot. I must say your work
speaks for itself; and I hope to receive some kind of response from you.
I would like some information in regards to how you bend your beams on
your arbors; I am not trying to "copyright" your work by any means. I
would also like to know about all 3 types of plastics and the hollow PVC
you write about in your arbor section of your website. Please let
me know where you can purchase these types of materials. I have been a
subcontractor for almost 10 years and just now starting my own business
in Houston. I hope to hear from you soon along with any "tips" you
would like to offer. Please feel free to contact me personally at
832-XXX-5788 or respond to
my email. Like yourself, I like to create my own unique designs
and I would appreciate any help to separate myself from other builders
in Texas. I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Greg
No reply, just my comments:
This guy hails from the "Me
First; Me
Now" generation.
He feels he deserves to be just handed-over my
hard-earned techniques of 20 years and my sources of time-tested
materials just for the asking, just so he can distinguish himself from
his other "fellow builders" in Houston, Texas.
I'm not out to change
the world by revealing my trade secrets. I educate by example and that
is what this website is all about.
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Frame Sagging
 Inquiry:
Mr. Deck, I purchased
EPS's Plastic Lumber to do a patio cover that extends from the house.
Unfortunately we are having a problem and I don't know if it's the
material or the weather, as I live in the desert (Indio CA). I'm
sending you these pictures so maybe you can help.
Joists bowed →
The trellis is 33 ft in length 11 1/2 ft in width and 7'.9" in height.
Take a look at the pictures attached to see bowing lumber above. Our
spans are 7ft on ends and 8 ft between interior columns. We are
thinking about getting your 4x6 or 6x6 columns and combining it with
EPS's lumber products to get a better supported structure. We also
need to hang three 25llb fans
on it. We currently have 4x4s for posts, 2x6s for joists and 2x2s for
the remainder. Help!!!
Posts buckling→
PS: The lumber started bowing long before we placed weight on it.
My reply: Oh really now. You didn't
buy the material from us and we didn't design or engineer the structure
for you. So just why am I being asked to help you solve your problems?
My Comments: This an amateur job done by
the a contractor who quit after it all got out of hand. He applied what
he knew about wood to solid-plastic lumber. The material was recommended
by the contractor and ordered by his customer but the contractor never had any experience in handling it.
Beams and joists sagging
Even if I were to be paid, I couldn't salvage this
disaster because this is not how one uses solid-plastic lumber.
Now the owner is paying the price big time -- this structure will have to be
scrapped. I say, "Don't come to me when your project gets all screwed
up -- you should contact me from the get-go."
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Send me an email and maybe we’ll start "communicating".
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here to contact me.
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